The Roommate

Nothing game changing here: an absurdly good looking young woman leaves her small town to attend college in the big city.  Her new seemingly loyal roommate soon turns batshit insane for no apparent reason, stalking her life, getting rid of whatever is separating them, then, of course, ultimately trying to kill her. 

Party-girl dormmate getting too clingy?  Off you go.  Pervert teacher getting too touchy feely?  Blackmail!  Innocent kitty cat creating a wedge?  Audios! Ex boyfriend occupying too much of her time?  Slice!

Same old song.

I honestly have no idea what someone would get out of a flick like The Roommate.  Teenagers propelled it to the number one movie last week because it is PG-13, stars people they know, and looks somewhat scary.  But did they enjoy it?  I simply don’t understand how one could.  

Broadening my mind as much humanly possible, I can tell you that the film isn’t at all frightening, its dialogue is laugh-out-loud ridiculous and its climactic scene is anything but.

Movies like this forgo a lot of things.  Character development, an engrossing narrative, and plot analysis to name a few.  And the reason is simple: because the targeted demographic, by and large, doesn’t give a shit about those things.  But why do you go to a horror film?  To be scared, right?  So if the movie isn’t scary (at all), doesn’t that defeat the purpose?

One slight, miniscule, feeble, ever-so-slender notion of redemption: lead actress Minka Kelly as the stalked roommate.  Kelly, best known as a cheerleader in the Friday Night Lights TV show and the everything-little-thing’s-gonna-be-all-right bow tie to (500) Days of Summer, has genuine star quality.  In The Roommate, she projects the girl next door vibe pretty well, and manages to talk and carry herself in restrained ways that seem unfitting to the film’s over-the-top execution.

In short, I’m looking forward to what Kelly does as an actress.  I’ll give her another shot.  The Roommate?  No way, strictly dead on arrival.  D-